Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Anger Management

I get angry way too fast.For the silliest of things.Its been something I ve been tryin to control for waaayy too long...The only thing that has changed is the way I deal with it.

When i was little, I get angry or throw a tantrum, I usually resort to lying on the floor and curling myself up to form a tiny lil egg shape form...It was like a snail shell technique.Either that or hiding under the bed.Oh i loved that place.While most kids were scared of bogeymen under the bed, I think i spend bout 70% of my childhood under the bed.I slept there, ate meals there, did my homework there or just bitched bout life with my invisible buddies.

When i grew a lil older,I started to scribble on books or just tear up bits of papers.That didnt go too well cos it made me feel real psycho-ish and I ended up tearing a lot of my sister's study stuff..So she wasn't too happy bout that too.

Later I moved on to door slamming or just throwing stuff around.Door slamming I inherited from my dad.Throwing things around didn't work too well either cos i had to clean up the mess at the end by myself.

Then came the phase of heavy metal and crazy rock.Nothing like music to soothe ur agonies.Just feeling the furniture vibrate with the heavy bass used to make my heart beat faster.Singing along with it gives ya a whole different kinda high.

Then came the most effective therapy of all...writing.I had this lil anger journal which is gonna be one of the main reasons why I'm gonna end up in Hell.People write a lotta lousy stuff when they're pissed off.The only thing to remember here is to either burn the damn thing when your done with it or to make sure noone never ever gets even a glimpse through it.Writing sometimes just fueled my anger rather than supress it.Re-reading what I'd written just helped me remember even more clearly why exactly I'm angry.

So currently, these are the stuff I do to help control my anger or even depression.And I think its worked the best of all -

1) get drunk

2) if u can't afford that, get high on chocolate.Forget bout calories.This one is defn worth it.

3) (a)Call up a friend who could'nt care less bout ur problem but will crack u up.When I'm depressed I'm not looking for someone to talk to bout it.I'm looking for someone to help me forget bout it.(b) Call up everyone on ur phone list.At least one of them is bound to make u feel glad u exist.

4) T.V. 10 continous seasons of F.R.I.E.N.D.S is not gonna leave much space up there to be thinking bout any silly ol problem.

5) Dance. You do not have to be a trained dancer for this one.Nor do u have to have any sense of rhythm or whateva.Just move the way u want to.And I'd close the curtains if I were u.

6)Shop till you drop. Be nice to urself even if noone else is.Pamper yourself.

7) Go home. This applies only if u've got problems with your friends,work,college or boys.At that point knowing that u've alwayz got family to fall back on is suuuuch a relief.I come home and one look at my niece's or nephew's face and all tha anger and hurt sorta just uncoils itself and crawls outta me.Sounds lame I know but its a fact.Ur lucky if u've got kids of ur own.Personalized depression pills.or atleast thats wat I think.

8) Write in your blog bout stuff u do wen ur angry and pretend people actually give a damn. :-)