Thursday, June 17, 2010

Stupid Cupid

I know a lotta unhappy single people. Ok no I don't. Only unhappy single person I know is me. Apparently the whole entire rest of the world is busy hooking up. So anyways, I came up with a list of reasons why its so fantabulously awesome being single. Now, I know lotta un-single people are gonna read this and have a problem with it. Well, screw you. I'm gona say all sorta rubbish if its gona make me feel better. You go cry bout it to your girl/guy while I cry bout it to.. um.. well my computer. Wow, now that does not make me look like a geek at all!

10 reasons to stay single

1. You're saner. Notice how people in love just seem to lose it? I mean up until the day before it happens, they're all normal. The very next day they're stressing over questions to which the answer seems pretty darn simple to you..Lose the guy/girl! As a single person, you do not forget that PDA is gross. You do not forget that "mushy fwd messages" are not an appropriate status message. You do not forget that colour-coding your clothes with anyone is lame.

2. You get to play the field. The most obvious reason of them all. And even if your not even in the field and have no intention of playing, you still have the option. (unless you're a geek who complains to her computer) which is quite a relief. Its like having a whole lotta apples instead of one big pineapple. Besides if some of the apples rot, you have still more apple. If the pineapple rot, you think you can throw it out, but u can't. You're stuck with the pineapple, the spikes and everything. And sometimes pineapples tend to make your tongue itch. Ever notice that? Um, I mean the actual pineapples. Lost track of the metaphor.

3.You don't have to dress to impress. I mean, I know not a lotta people do it, but i happen to know a few couple who wears only exactly what the other person wants them to wear. Everyday. Which I think is completely and utterly ridiculous. Same goes with changing hairdos and piercings and moreon. When people are done asking parents for permission, they find themselves a new permission-giver. Then again, these kindsa couples are not that common any more, but they do still exist just for the sole purpose of making me gag.

4. I can choose not to pick up the phone and not be given the third degree for it. Nobody spends a sleepless night if I forget to call back after I promised I would (well not a lotta people) or if I fall asleep while speaking to them. I do not require special talktime schemes and free messages or lovey dovey fwd messages. I don't have to call a certain somebody first on New Year's or Valentines Day or Christmas or when England wins the World Cup. I can just randomly punch numbers. I don't have to send Good Night and Good Morning messages (I wouldnt even if I had to) I don't have to explain why my phone was busy or switched off or why I took so long to pick up. I don't need to depend on any certain sumbody's call or message to make me happy or turn my day better. I can choose whoever I want to make me smile.

5. I don't have to worry about waxing.

6. I don't have to pretend to laugh at unfunny things.No such thing like even if noone elses laughs, I'm supposed to laugh. No such obligation. I don't have to like things I don't have to like. Like cricket or action movies or v-necks.

7. I don't have to think bout any special somebody when I hear any song or movie or book. I can just hear the song or watch the movie or read the book without distractions.

8. I get to use public transport and not the backseat of some ratty old bike or car, Or worse, walk!

9. I get to go shopping and walk past the men's wear section without thinking "Oh, so and so would look so nice in this". I get to spend all my money on me!

10. I don't have to wait for just one person to tell me I'm beautiful or gorgeous. I can just put up an awesome profile pic up and get like a bazillion comments And likes.

And one more..

11. Movies with tragic endings where the hero and heroine don't end up together makes me happy. Its realistic.. or so I like to think.

And ok one more thing. What's the deal with cupid? Is it a kid or a midget or a what? And if it's a lil kid then how can he be setting people up? I mean he's just a kid. Aren't girls and lovey stuff supposed to be ''yucky'' to him? If its a midget, then who wants to be set up by a dude in a diaper?? And I doubt if he's had much of a personal life to start with thanks to the diaper and insanely red cheeks.

So I end on a happy note. Singledom is to be cherished. Singledom is a gift from God. Singledom ROCKS!


Anonymous said...

cupid is not stupid at all

caZper said...

nyc one...tho i culdnt understand some of nice to see u on blogger after a while..

Samiha said...

Let's go find where Cupid lives and put shit in his diaper. And then tell his friends he had an "Accident". Hahaha. He would not be fit enough to lift his arrow after that..

m@dz said...

Well done Anj!! That was SUPER! U really make singlehood sound fantastic! So ya to all those couples, tough luck!!
Thank you!

~Ms. A~ said...

@anonymous- read the post again, I've mentioned that I do not care if non-single people agree with me or not..

@caz- what did u not understand? how could you of all the people not understand?half the post is bout people like you.

@sam- he probably dusnt have any friends, the sad loser.he has no social life which is why he'd rather meddle in other ppl's lives.

@mad- thank u woman! we so totally rock!

ramzi said... always, very cool post.. uve just made singledom sound so much fun and better! serious! way to go, girl!

Anonymous said...

Oki Anju at that time a on mobile and a big stupid behind me(sadly he is my boss n he is peeping in to my mobile) , so i can't concentrate at all. Now let me come to point. i had to disagree with you some reasons that you posted. First of about a dress code, am a non- single but I never used a dress code in my life. Then I never cared about my cloth even I never used to iron my cloths too. Next about play filed, yup that's correct and I agree with you and you know that part on my story. The about pineapples, yeah am stuck on it.
About phones calls yes again i agree with you. I haven't slept about thinking what the hell happened other side. Then busy matters never came in to my life.
The reading and other stuffs, that depends what your mental strength.
There are no laws in world that GF should travel on his bike or car.
Ah you were taking about money matters, who care about money i haven't purchased for my GF in my life to make her happy. If she need she can get from parents before marriage.
10 is ok for me
Again i would like to ask you that why you hate Cupid much like this, he is doing his duty one day he will one arrow for you too :)

~Ms. A~ said...

@ ramz- thank u girl.. and i didnt make it sound cool. it IS cool. not enough ppl realise it!

@ vr- thanks for the comment. and i doubt if i l get hit by cupid's arrow. till now all his arrows have just bounced off me. :-)

miroslav said...

This is cupid speaking and here is a piece of information that might help u. "My life Sucks!"

Anonymous said...

hmm you will get one soon.Right now too many arrows are flying around you na. So choose one carefully and keep it forever.Remember cupid never fails.In my case we never imagined about our relation, we know each other before.But we never talked or cared. But time came for us and we become one :)

CRD said...

Felt good while your post lasted...

Post over now!!

I'm sad again...I dont wanna be single!!!



Kingpin said...

Hahaha. No way!

Saurabh Panshikar said...

great post!
Totally agree with it... Especially with point 2 and 4!

Being single rocks!

Prashanth Nagaraj said...

Couldn't agree with yu more...!!
Tho' First 5 points took lotta time to read... :P

Nice findings......

...nIShAntH... said...

Just remembered the time when my x told me i was immature. Then i pinched her hand and ran laughing like a lil girl.
Anyways...Good to see that you are still throwin up funny posts like this one here.Good to be single.Hell yeah!

~Ms. A~ said...

@miroslav : point noted :-) n btw..cheer up..

@web : the arrows around me are hardly arrows.. more like pencil points.. so not gona get hit by any of them.. guarenteed!

@crd : nobody does,man.. thats when they write posts like this. :-(

@kingpin : wat u mean hahaha no way? do u below to the un-single majority? r u scoffing us poor single souls? >:-(

@sau : YEAH! singehood rocks!

@prasanth : i honestly ran outta things to say after the first 5 points.. :-) thanks for reading..

@nish : thanks for that heart-warming anecdote.. completed the point i was trying to make :-D thanks for reading!

yojitA said...

"A" : but im loving being single now!! u need to go through all phases i guess!
as for now singledom rocks!